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LEAPING INTO THE UNKNOWN!

I boldly committed to writing 365 words a day for 365 days, and leapt onto the page, typing enthusiastically until the screeching realization about 10 days into it, that 2012 actually has 366 days! Dang it!

I could write 366 words for 366 days, or write 366 words every 4th posting. Perhaps I should blaze through the first 365 days of the year and take New Year’s Eve off. Then it dawned on me that Leap Year threw me for a loop, so for Leap Year, I would leap into something new!

Grab my hand and let's leap!

I cruised through the blogosphere enjoying the scenery and feeling for some inspiration and found it on Smile, kiddo. The blog introduced this 101 in 1001 project, shared their list and experiences. In a nutshell, the goal stands to complete 101 goals in 1001 days. Smile, kiddo referred to Day Zero Project for a pile of ideas and suggestions for one’s lists. The fact that it was called Day Zero meant that really, I could still call it 365 days of 365 words since a zero doesn’t count.  I’m a little OCD like that.  Even if you don’t do a list, it’s a fun site to browse to see what occupies other people’s wish lists.

It took longer than expected, but I finally compiled my list of 101 things:

I’ve always wanted to do but never made time for
I loved as a child and couldn’t wait to share with my own children
That made me sweat a little because they test my usual comfort zone
To allow me some time for introspection and growth
To allow me to connect with others That are completely random and wacky
That I’m leaving up to YOU! Leave a comment on the list page to suggest what you’d have me do and when we get a bunch, I’ll do a random drawing to pick out the activity!

I will indicate on the list as things are completed, or link to the blog posting about my experience.  I hope some of you will come along and consider making your own lists as well, and wander off with me for some exciting adventures!

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DATING POOL – IS IT SAFE TO GO IN?

Many of my friends met amazing dates or awesome future-spouses online. Utilizing computers’ brains to define one’s heart presented uber-compatible matches. While I remained cautious about starting relationships for my kids’ (and briefly, my own) sanity, I wanted to make sense of the “playing field” at this stage of my life. I didn’t put the weight of marriage on each first date, but kept the big picture in mind. My girlfriends and I narrowed the pool down to four general guy groups. These didn’t reflect anyone we know, but this grouping made the most sense to us.

Bachelor Adam *sigh*

1) The eternal bachelor – ‘Til you come along! Suddenly you, the woman he’s waited for, glided towards him with your intoxicatingly golden aura, stole his breath and hooked him. PRO: You two could define “marriage” together with no habits to break. CON: Being a person who either lived by the seat of his pants, or lived with uninterrupted routines for years – would a romantic partner fit in?

Marry Me Again, or I'll marry again...

2) The serial groom – Kept marrying the wrong girl while searching the world to find you! PRO: He loved marriage, settling down with and exploring life together as a couple. CON: Could be easily distracted or impatient. QUESTION: What magic number would change the number of marriages from “No worries” to “No Way!”?

Sharp dressed man

3) The career dude – Neither of the above, he put career before women to provide a stable foundation for any relationship. PRO: He prioritized well and thrived with increasing pressure and responsibility. CON: Could he switch gears to find more balance, not just all work all the time?

4) The Ross – “We were on a break!” Enough said, drama!

Once the men, passed the first round of consideration, one’s history qualified them further – especially for us single moms. When I joke to my friend that it’s uncomfortable to bring up background checks over cocktails, she laughs – working at the police station, she’s pulled that information after the first phone call.

Realizing that this kills the spontaneity and romance, perhaps speed dating would silence the “What Ifs’”. You could find the man of your dreams, or (as I’ve said before) worse comes to worst, a new business contact!

So true

HOW MANY SOUL MATES DOES ONE GET IN A LIFETIME?

Soul Mates

I’m reading an article about the latest evolution of online dating called christianmingle.com that claims to find “God’s match for you.” I snort at the site’s indirect claim that God only works through this website. I feel he’d put your soul mate in your path out in the every day world. I’m really curious about the 1,000 people that popped up in the author’s “soul mate” search.

How many soul mates does one get in a lifetime? Having that many potential soul mates makes the whole notion less romantic. Granted, with millions of people in the world, I suppose it still makes you feel like a lottery winner when you beat the odds and serendipitously run into your true soul mate to spend the rest of your married life with. The article also points out that the notion of soul mates means people wait longer to get married, and many divorce the moment the relationship gets difficult because they don’t want to waste a moment looking for their true best natural fit.

During coffee with my high school girlfriends, one happily married friend suggested that perhaps our friends are our soul mates, not our spouses. Webster, IX defines soul mate as “a person temperamentally suited to another.” Who else makes suggestions resulting in you smacking your forehead because they know you better than you know yourself? Who talks you into running a marathon for your 40th birthday then loves you even though you only do the ½ marathon? Who consoles you when your significant other is breaking your heart?

Friends.

I believe a soul mate challenges you to be the best you. I also agree that everyone who comes through our life has a purpose – best friend, taxing personality or even ex-husband. Finally, I think we all have to know who we are and not wait for the one that “completes us” – Sorry Jerry. If you haven’t gotten lost in my “creative” logic, I agree with my friend and buying into the 1,000 soul mates. So far I only have 467 on Facebook, plus add a few more that prefer face-to-face status updates, so I can’t wait to see whom I encounter next. Share your opinion!

Article: http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2012/01/07/is-god-going-to-hook-me-up-online-assessing-christian-mingle-and-soul-mates/?hpt=hp_c3

JOB HUNTING IS LIKE ONLINE DATING

Morning coffee routine

Over coffee, my friend shared her online dating perspective with me, “When I show up for dates, if it goes well – fantastic! If not, then I have a new business contact.” I think she’s onto something.

As a current job-seeker, I’m eager, open to possibilities, and have a diverse background. I find myself torn between going steady with a reliable job or temping around. Plus, finding a job is very different now than when I first looked so I struggle with my approach vacillating between looking myself or using a service (don’t get me started on bar mixers).

For some companies I have created profiles detailing my positive qualities and hopeful work “must-haves.” Many limit your choices.  I post a friendly picture and if my profile has the key words that tickle HR’s fancy, I’ll get a “Wink” or “Joe Bossman is interested” email.  What I usually get are spammers who want money wired to their accounts immediately.

I primarily look myself, or trust my friends to set me up with something great.  I gather job listings and groom my resume to reflect what they are looking for hoping to land on top of the prospect list.  I never lie about my past, or change myself into someone I’m not to land a job, I simply speak their language.

At this cross-roads, I’m debating if I want a full-time, predictable job where I can build a foundation, grow together, have an on-going impact and create a long history.  I’d love the regular support of benefits, investment in my advancement, coupled with appreciation from their end of my faithful dedication to the company.

But get real, this is the 21st century.  Sadly, many marriages and jobs last only 4 years.  Living in a city where the possibility to freelance seems great (just a feeling, no statistic), perhaps I want the novelty of living for the assignment, constantly meeting new people, pushing the boundaries of my comfort zone.  Aren’t we all more daring when we know that it’s short-term?

Hopefully, as with dating, the job will come when you stop looking and are least expecting it – since I’m blogging, not searching. What’s currently working for your search?